reading

Punished #5

By anakdenesor - September 29, 2020

Title: Punished

Author: Vanessa Steel

Format: Paperback

Page:336 Pages

Publisher: Harper Collins Publisher

ISBN: 9780007256815

A Mother's Cruelty. a Daughter's Survival. a Secret That Couldn't be Told.

'Punished' is the inspiring true story of an unusual little girl, Vanessa, whose childhood was devastated by torture and abuse at the hands of her sadistic mother. Vanessa was nearly destroyed until she discovered a secret that ultimately saved her life. From the age of 3, Vanessa lived in daily terror of her mother's unpredictable rage. If she was 'naughty', her mother would lash out at her - with beatings, torture, starvation and making Vanessa sleep in their garden's pigsty, tied up like an animal. Her mother said her punishments were God's revenge on her for being the devil's child. Her father lived in denial of her suffering.

When she was 6 years old, Vanessa's grandfather began to sexually abuse her - to her despair, aided and abetted by both her mother and grandmother. At eight years old, she then discovered that the 'mother' who hated her so much had adopted her as a baby and would never love her as her own. At the most horrific times of Vanessa's abuse, she nearly lost all hope that she would escape her prison, until mysterious things started to happen to her that allowed her to fight back. This is the story of how Vanessa survived a childhood that nearly destroyed her and how her secret led her out of the horrors of her past.

My library have a corner for a books that have some issues with it and only staff that allowed to read that, e.g. LGBT book. Since my library will officially open after midterm break which is the beginning of October, I need to do some clearing and turn out I found this book while tidying that area.

This will be my first time reading such a harrowing but inspiring true story of a little girl who survived a terrifying childhood that nearly destroyed her. Vanessa growing up with a lot of questions that plagued her throughout life. What had her done to make her mom hate Vanessa so much that she did so many cruel things to Vanessa. Did her mother remember all the times she almost killed Vanessa? Why her mother allow her to be a victim of terrible abuse? What crime had she committed?Why had she punished Vanessa endlessly and thoroughly and with spite and cruelty from the day she was born?

Honestly..I'm not finishing this book. I can't stand all the torment that she have been through. This book was hard for me to read because of the graphic details. Ever since she was 3 years old her mother will punished her and it getting worst when her grandfather involved into it too. She's been grooming to become her grandfather sexual gratification and when she reach at 8 years old he raped her.

'Grandpa led me down the steps into the garage.

"I have got a new game today,"he said,as he shut the door behind us. "You'll like it,it's really fun."But I knew we weren't playing...and the woman who should have been protecting me from this was calmly filing her nails in the garage doorway.'

From what i have read, the only love that her mother have is the love for her grandfather. I believed that her mother also being brought up same situation like her. The only thing that she understand is if you want someone to love you, you have to follow whatever that you being told to do. I will have to put down the book and take a deep breath every time she being torture. Try to gather my strength to finish this book, unfortunately I failed to do that. I think this book make me curse a lot.😅 I really hate it. How come you do that to the innocent little child. Thus I can't make it to the end, I only can write this far so no stars for this post😔

-xoxo-